Kurama's Gift
by KyoHana
Summary: Hiei returns to visit Shiori on the first anniversary of Kurama's death. Why has the little demon remained gone for so long? Hint of Shounen Ai HK UPDATED slight revision to Chapter 4 AND COMPLETE.
1. Prelude

_**(Standard disclaimer: I don't own YYH or its characters; they are the sole property of Yoshihiro Togashi, Shonen Jump Comics Weekly, Studio Pierrot and Fuji Television)**_

**_----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_**

A year…..

…..and in that time the pain had not lessened. It cut sharply through his heart, the wound still as raw, still as fresh as it had been that night…..

…..a year ago…..

…..a year ago **_this_ **very day.

And if it was like that for him, how much worse was it for **_her_**, he wondered as he looked down from his perch, staring at the small house before him; his heart again warring with his head. He had no right to be here, he told himself, yet his heart yearned to see her again – to be with her – to give what comfort he could, and to have her comfort the lonely child hidden deep within himself as she had so many times before…..

…..before that night...

Stifling a sigh, he tore his eyes away from the house. No, he would leave her in peace, he decided. She deserved **_that_** much at least. He stood then, taking one last look at the house as if to memorize every detail of that which was already seared within his memory, but it seemed his heart would have its way this time, as he flitted nimbly from the tree on which he'd perched to the second-floor window. Had it been left open purposely?

"I'd hoped you might come today," the quiet voice spoke from the shadows. A barely audible **_click_** as she turned on the lamp, and the room was bathed in soft light, illuminating the small figure in black as he balanced upon the ledge.

Hiei looked around the room that had once belonged to the only person he'd evercalled 'friend'; his eyes taking in the small, evergreen bonsai sitting on the desk, the shelves holding Kurama's books, the framed photographs on the wall. It was all just as he'd remembered – she had changed nothing in the year that had passed since her son's death. Finally his eyes settled on the woman seated on the bed, her legs curled under her, her hands folded atop the closed book in her lap. Shiori returned his look, smiling a welcome that warmed the lonely little youkai's heart.

"I'm glad to see you, Hiei," she said, "it's been far too long since you've been here."

"I thought it best to stay away," he replied, his gaze sliding away from hers. "I didn't want to cause you more grief; to remind you that it was I….." his voice trailed off as he looked at her again…..

….."Kaasan," he breathed, a silent plea in the depths of his wine-colored eyes.

She saw him again then, as she had that first night. The night Shuiichi had brought the little fire demon to his room – sick with, of **_all_** things, a human flu! The night she'd learned her son's secret; his 'true nature' as he'd called it.


	2. Secrets

_**(Standard disclaimer: I don't own YYH or its characters; they are the sole property of Yoshihiro Togashi, Shonen Jump Comics Weekly, Studio Pierrot and Fuji Television)**_

**Type in _italics_ indicates 'flashback' sequence**

**Type in non-_italics_ indicates song lyrics.**

**: blah; blah; blah : indicates dream sequence**

* * *

_Soft rapping on the door, followed by an even softer call – "Kaasan?"_

_Shiori looked up, automatically closing the book she'd been reading and placing it on the night table by her bed. Again the knock came, more insistent this time, followed by her son's voice….. _

…_.."Kaasan, please?" _

_There was a sense of urgency in his voice, and she rose, wrapping her robe around her slender figure as she walked to the door and slid it open. Kurama stood there, his posture tense, his handsome features twisted in worry – and fear._

"_What is it, Shuiichi?" she asked, distressed by the troubled look he wore. "What's wrong, musuko-chan?"_

"_He's sick, Kaasan," he replied, his voice trembling, "I've tried everything I know, even giving him some of my ki, but **nothing** seems to help."_

"_Who's sick?" Her voice was deliberately soft, filled with motherly concern as she sought not only to calm her son but to try and draw him out as well. And what's 'ki', she wondered but didn't ask, knowing now was not the time for idle questions._

"_M-my friend, Hiei. Please, Kaasan," he begged, "I don't know what else to do – and Yukina's away!"_

"_Shhh, it's going to be all right now, my love," she smiled reassuringly then took his arm, turning him around and steering him back toward his room; again, wondering who this Yukina might be, but wisely remaining silent. "Together we'll take care of your friend; see that he gets well," she said instead._

_Kurama nodded in relief, allowing himself to be led down the short hallway, but just as they reached his room, he stopped._

"_Shu-chan?" She looked up, searching his face, puzzled as to why he suddenly seemed reluctant to enter the room._

"_Kaasan," he replied, returning her gaze, his emerald eyes troubled, "before we go in, there is something I must tell you… about Hiei…" He paused, swallowed and looked at her a moment longer before he slid his eyes away to study the wall opposite. She waited patiently until finally, he tore his gaze from the wall, looking back down at her. "He isn't human, Kaasan," he said, "Hiei is a youkai – a fire demon… well," he allowed himself a brief grin, "part of him is anyway, the other is Koorime." _

_Again he hesitated, his eyes holding hers as he took another deep breath. "And there's more… something you need to know about your son as well… about his past… and the lie he's lived for so long now…"_

_Shiori reached up, placing her finger to his lips, stilling his voice. "It can wait," she said smiling up at him. "There'll be time for explanations after... What's important now is that we take care of your friend…Hiei did you say his name was?"_

* * *

_Hiei looked up as the door slid open, ruby eyes flicking from Kurama to the woman at his side then back again. He was shivering, yet even from where she stood, Shiori could feel the heat of his fever and in the dim lamplight, see clearly the flush of his cheeks, the sweat pouring down his face._

"_Kurama," Hiei said, trying to stand, "why the **hell** did you bring her he….."_

_He had no chance to finish as a bout of coughing seized his small form. He sank back down onto the bed, bent almost double as the bout continued. Without hesitation, Shiori hurried to his side, sitting on the bed and wrapping her arms around him, supporting the shaking body until the fit finally came to an end._

"_Get your hands **off** me," the Koorime demanded when he could speak clearly again, and wrenched himself out of her embrace. "I don't need help from anyone, least of all, **YOU**!"_

"_Hiei….." Kurama began, his soft tenor taking on a dangerous edge as he glared at the little youkai._

"_Hn," Hiei retorted, returning the glare, his red eyes glittering dangerously._

_Not offended by the rebuff, Shiori rose from the bed and went to her son. Putting her hand on his arm, she began to issue instructions. "Shuiichi, dear, please get your friend something warm and dry to change into then help him to bed. Hiei," she turned to the little demon, "I need to know your normal body temperature."_

"_Why?" he demanded._

"_Because you have a **fever**," Kurama replied, shaking his head in exasperation. Pausing, he took a deep breath to calm himself then went on, "and Kaasan needs to take your temperature to determine just how bad that fever is. Therefore, she needs a point of reference."_

_Shiori smiled at her son, patting his arm. "I'll be back shortly," she said, heading out the door._

"_It's 100," Hiei muttered darkly at her retreating form and she turned, giving him a smile._

"_Thank you, Hiei-san," she replied with a nod then turned, hurrying out of the room._

_Shiori returned a short time later, a tray in her hands. On it there sat a digital thermometer; a small teapot, steam issuing through its spout; a cup and saucer; a spoon; and a bottle of aspirin. Placing the tray on Kurama's desk, she turned, smiling gently at the small figure sitting, propped up by pillows, in her son's bed, her heart melting at the sight. He looked, for all the world, like some forgotten street urchin in Shuiichi's too large pajamas. She smiled, too, at her son who had drawn his desk chair up to the bed and was now seated next to his friend; his quiet presence reassuring the little Koorime._

_Picking up the thermometer, Shiori opened the case and took it out, pressing the small button on top to activate it, then stretched out her hand. "Place it under your tongue and hold it there, please, Hiei," she instructed, handing the instrument to him._

"_Hn," Hiei grunted in response, obediently taking the thermometer and putting it beneath his tongue, his lips clamping down to hold it in place, his eyes intently studying the ningen woman as she turned back to the tray on the desk._

_Shiori lifted the teapot, pouring the steaming liquid it contained into the delicate china cup on the tray. Setting the pot back down, she picked up the aspirin bottle, uncapping it and pouring two of the small white pills into the cap then dumping them into the cup as well. Picking up the spoon, she began to stir the contents, watching as the aspirin dissolved into it. _

_Kurama smiled fondly as he watched his mother, his keen sense of smell deftly separating the scents from the cup into separate parts: tea, honey, lemon, the aspirin tablets, and brandy – his mother's version of the Western 'hot toddy'. How many times had she plied him with the same remedy when he'd been sick – cold, fever and chills wracking his human body? It had always helped, bringing down his fever, soothing his aching throat; but **he** was, after all, half-human. Would it do the same for Hiei, who was a full-blooded demon, he wondered. He fervently hoped so as he watched her now, taking the thermometer from Hiei's mouth and putting it beneath the lighted lamp on his desk so that she could read the digital display more clearly._

"_What is it, Kaasan?" he asked, seeing her lips draw down in a slight frown. "What's wrong?"_

"_Nothing, dear," she smiled reassuringly at him. "Hiei's temperature is 110, and I'm not sure… A human's temperature can go as high as 105 before the body's natural defenses kick in to ensure that it doesn't go any higher. But with a demon… well…" again she smiled, putting the thermometer on the tray, "I'm afraid, as I've no experience in that area, we'll just have to wait and see…"_

_She picked up the teacup and saucer, holding the delicate china out to Hiei. "Drink it slowly," she told him._

"_What do we do, then?" Kurama asked as Hiei accepted the cup from Shiori and took a sip of the hot liquid._

"_Try to bring his temperature down… the aspirin I put in the tea should help – at least, I hope that it will. And rest," she said, "Hiei needs to stay in bed, not only until the fever has broken, but a day or two after that as well, so he can stay with us….."_

"_I'll be **damned** if I will," Hiei broke in, swallowing hard, his ruby eyes blazing over the rim of the cup._

"_I don't believe you were given a choice," Shiori returned mildly, arching an eyebrow at him. "Now, finish your tea, lie down and be quiet, please."_

"_Bossy ningen female," he muttered, though he did as she bid, taking another sip of the tea._

"_Irascible imp," she shot back, the smile in her words turning the retort into an endearment._

_Hiei blinked in surprise then looked at Kurama, a slow grin spreading over his face, softening the sharp features. "She gives as good as she gets," he commented._

"_Hai, she does," Kurama agreed, smiling affectionately at his 'kaasan'. He rose gracefully from his chair, winding an arm around her waist and leaning in, placed a light kiss on her cheek. With his arm still about her, he looked over at the diminutive fire demon, leaf-green eyes alight with mischief. _

"_She can be quite obstinate as well; especially if she feels she's being crossed. So I'd suggest you do as she says, Hiei," he finished, grinning down at his small friend._

"_As well, **she'd** also appreciate it if you two would **stop **referring to her in the third person… as if she weren't even in the same room with you," she teasingly scolded, reaching her hand up and playfully tweaking her son's earlobe._

_Hiei caught both the gesture and the affectionate smile Kurama gave Shiori in return; his heart filling once more with the old familiar ache – the longing for a mother's love and to give that love in return. Gods! How he envied Kurama this moment! Quickly he ducked his head, hiding his eyes and the pain that had flared briefly in their crimson depths at the by-play between mother and son._

_But a mother's eyes are quick and keen – a mother's heart even quicker, as Shiori caught the look; her own eyes misting with unshed tears. She blinked them back then looked up at her son._

"_Shu-chan," she asked, stepping out of his embrace and going to the desk "be a dear and take this to the kitchen and brew another pot of tea for me, will you?" She picked up the empty teapot and turning, handed it to him._

"_I'm forgiven then, am I?" Kurama grinned, taking the piece of crockery from her hand._

"_Always," she answered, returning his smile as she blew him a kiss._

_Kurama walked to the door, stopping to retrieve his robe and pajamas from where they lay, neatly folded at the foot of the bed. Sliding the door open, he stepped through, and as he slid it softly shut again, he felt a smile steal across his lips as he heard the words she'd spoken so often to him now whispered just as tenderly to his dearest friend….._

"_Come now, little one, time to sleep."_

* * *

_Kurama paused just outside his door, the insulated carafe he'd poured the newly brewed tea into balanced precariously atop an armload of blankets and pillows, listening. He smiled as he recognized the song he heard his mother singing in her low, slightly throaty alto. Awkwardly shifting his load, he reached out, silently sliding the door open. He stepped through; sliding the door shut behind him, and stood there, his emerald eyes riveted on the tableau before him. _

_Shiori was sitting on the edge of the bed, her hand held tightly in that of the sleeping youkai's as she softly continued the lullaby Kurama had so loved as a child._

Is it underneath the willow tree  
That I've been dreaming of?

Where is she,  
Who I close my eyes to see?  
Will I ever know the sweet 'hello'  
That's meant for only me?

Who can say where she may hide?  
Must I travel far and wide?  
'Til I am beside the someone who  
I can mean something to…..

Where…..  
Where is Love

"_It's been far too long since I've heard that," he said quietly coming to stand beside her as she finished the song. Placing the carafe on the desk and dropping the blankets and pillows to the floor, he leaned down, placing another feather-soft kiss upon her cheek._

_Shiori looked up, watching her son as he went to his closet. "Ah," she replied, her voice taking on a gently teasing note. "Are you telling me then, that you're still not too grown up for a lullaby from your mother?"_

_His answer was the beaming smile he returned as he set about spreading the futon he'd pulled from the closet onto the floor and arranging the blankets and pillows atop it. Sitting down, he_

_looked up at her as she leaned forward to smooth errant, spiky black bangs from Hiei's forehead and laid her hand against it, feeling the dampness and heat of his fever even through the bandanna he wore._

"_He calls you 'Kurama'," she said, removing her hand and sitting up straight once more. She turned slightly and looked down, meeting her son's wide, green eyes. "Is that your name?"_

"_Hai," he nodded, a sad light touching those beautiful eyes, "it was… a very long time ago."_

"_Tell me," she prompted, "I'd like to hear your story… and his."_

* * *

"_They called him the 'Forbidden Child'," Kurama began, nodding toward the little demon sleeping soundly in his bed. "His people are Koorime – Ice Demons. They are isolationists, living apart from the rest of the Makai – the Demon World – high atop a floating island. They have no contact with the outside world, indeed, it's forbidden by law for them to do so or to leave their island."_

_He paused a moment, emerald eyes intently studying the small figure in the bed. Shiori noted the sorrow in those eyes, the windows to her son's very soul, as he looked at the sleeping boy. He spoke again, and now she could hear that sorrow in his voice as well._

"_But his mother dared that which was forbidden, and in so doing, she met someone, fell in love, and gave birth to twins – a boy and a girl – Hiei and his sister, Yukina. Yukina inherited all of the traits of the Koorime and none of those that were her father's. Hiei…" again his eyes shifted to the boy, "though his mother was Koorime, inherited the traits of his fire demon father."_

"_Was, Shu-chan?" Shiori asked._

"_Hai," he replied with a nod. "Hina, that was her name, committed suicide several years after the birth of her twins."_

_He heard her sharp intake of breath and then the quietly asked question, "Why?" He looked at her for a long moment before answering, torn between anger and sorrow, his mouth twisting bitterly as he began to speak._

"_Since Yukina had inherited all her mother's Koorime traits, she was considered by the Koorime Counsel of Elders to be of 'pure' blood, and they allowed Hina to keep her. But Hiei… they saw him as a threat to their way of life, to their very existence. And so they tore him from his mother_

_and his sister… casting him out; literally throwing him off their world and into the one below… just an infant and they left him to die!"_

"_H-how?" she whispered, aghast. "How could they do that to this beautiful child? How could **ANY**one be so cruel?"_

_Kurama couldn't help himself; hearing his mother referring to the surly little fire demon as not only a child, but beautiful as well – he smiled. Well, **he'd** always thought Hiei was beautiful! He wondered, though, what her reaction would be if he was to tell her this 'child' was actually far older than she. The thought amused him and he chuckled softly to himself._

"_Something I said amuses you, musuko-chan?" Shiori asked testily, hearing his laugh._

"_Gomen, Kaasan," he replied with a shake of his head. "I was just imagining what Hiei would do if he heard himself being called beautiful."_

_Shiori huffed. "I don't care how he'd react. He **is** beautiful." She looked down at the slumbering youkai again, and reaching out once more, she laid her palm against his pale cheek in a gentle caress._

"_Shuiichi," she quietly said her son's name as she turned to face him. "His right arm is bandaged. Has he been injured?"_

_Kurama shook his head. "It's a ki ward, Kaasan."_

"_Ki ward?"_

"_Hai," he nodded. "Demons, and many humans, possess the ability to focus and manipulate their ki – their life energy, if you will. The bandanna on his forehead is also a ward, covering his Jagan so that it can't be seen, and thereby, injure an ordinary human. The one on his arm is there to keep the Kokuryuuha under restraint."_

_(Kokuryuuha… Dragon of the Darkness Flame?) _

_Seeing his mother's puzzled expression, Kurama hastened to explain, "by focusing his ki, Hiei is able to 'see' the auras of others, demon or human, with his Jagan. He also has the ability, again by using his ki in conjunction with the Jagan, to summon the Kokuryuuha, though doing so drains him considerably, and after, he's forced to sleep in order to regain his strength. Fortunately, he's such a skilled fighter he only uses the dragon as a last resort."_

"_I see," Shiori breathed turning back to the still figure on the bed. "He is much more than he seems."_

"_That he is, Kaasan," Kurama agreed._

"_And you, **my** son... you also are more than you seem as well?" It was not so much a question as a statement of fact._

"_Hai," he replied and seemed about to say something more when he stopped, merely looking at her with those luminous viridian eyes of his. _

_He gazed at her, this woman who was his mother – the **only** mother he'd ever really known. The one being in his long life who had taught him compassion, caring; who loved him unconditionally and taught him how to love that way in return. How would she feel, once she knew the secret he'd kept these last 17 years; the lie that had been his life… and, by extension, hers as well?_

_Yet he'd definitely heard the slight emphasis she'd placed on the word 'my'. Perhaps, then, everything would be all right. Perhaps she would still accept him as her own once he'd unburdened himself and she finally knew the truth._

"_In another lifetime," he began, "I was known as Youko Kurama. Though my body is now human, there lives within the soul of a youko – a kitsune spirit, centuries old."_

_He lowered his gaze from her, intently studying the folded hands in his lap. "The life I lived then was not exactly admirable. To put it bluntly, I was a thief." _

_He looked up, meeting her eyes once more. "The King of Thieves some called me. Stories, some attaining the status of legend, abounded through the Makai – all attesting to my skill as a thief. And there wasn't anything I wouldn't steal. I took it **all** … from jewels and money to ancient artifacts to hearts as well as lives. If I wanted it, it became mine. The kitsune view life as nothing more than a game to be played, and I played the game to the hilt._

_That is, until the day I got careless and was left to die in a pool of my own blood. I knew the wounds were fatal, but the kitsune in me refused to give up. I wasn't done playing the game, you see._

_So I left my bloodied body behind, escaping to the Nigenkai in search of a new body; someplace safe I could stay until the time that my spirit was strong enough to return to the Makai. And I found just such a place: an unborn child… **your** child, Kaasan."_

_Again he lowered his gaze to study the hands in his lap. "I never considered what I was doing was wrong, taking your child's life and making it my own. I never thought…" he swallowed, and Shiori watched him clench his hands until the knuckles of the slender fingers shone white in the dim lamplight. "I had never known the love of a mother for her child; my own mother had abandoned me centuries ago. I'd never known what it was to be cared for; to be the sole reason for another's existence… until you." He looked up at her, leaf-green eyes shining with unshed tears. "I didn't want that kind of life, or so I told myself. And yet, I found myself being drawn inexorably to it. So much so that I wanted to give back to you some measure of what you'd given to me. I wanted, no **needed**, to be loved and to love in return. I needed to love you, Kaasan, and I did, with no thought of myself… and this in itself was new and frightening, though wondrous at the same time; that I, the selfish, self-absorbed kitsune could feel this way for another!_

_And then, when you became so ill, I found out just exactly what I would do for my kaasan. I remembered rumors I'd heard of an artifact, the Forlorn Hope, it was called: a mirror that, when gazed upon on the night of the full moon, granted its user one wish… One only, because you see, at the moment the wish was granted, the Forlorn Hope took the user's life in payment for that wish. But I didn't care. I decided to steal the mirror and use it to wish for your life, Kaasan, in exchange for my own. It was the least I could do after all you'd given to me. And so I readily agreed when Hiei approached me with the idea of breaking into the vault of King Enma, the ruler of the Spirit World, and stealing the three artifacts stored there. I knew that one of them was the Forlorn Hope. I stole it and did, in fact, make my wish… but the mirror didn't take my life._

_It should have… I'd fully expected it would, so I hadn't bothered covering my tracks when I'd stolen it. But I lived… only because of the intervention of one very stubborn and persistent human boy. I was caught and sentenced to work with him as part of his team, as was Hiei. And somewhere during all the time we spent together, he and I moved beyond being mere team mates. We became friends, Kaasan, and that's where the story ends."_

_As her son finished his tale, Shiori reached out with her free hand, softly caressing his cheek. "I think you're wrong, musuko-chan," she said, "the story doesn't end there. In fact, I believe it's just beginning."_

_Kurama's hand went up to cover hers, pressing it into his cheek then turning his face slightly, he placed a kiss on her palm. He'd expected anger, rejection but instead, felt her overwhelming love, just as he always had._

"_Kurama," she smiled at him as she spoke, her voice soft, almost musing. "It's a lovely name."_

"_Thank you, Kaasan," he breathed, kissing the hand in his again._

"_You're welcome my beautiful kitsune." Pulling him to her, she leaned forward, placing a gentle kiss on his forehead. "Now," she said, "it's late and I think we've talked enough for one night. Time you were asleep, love."_

"_Hai, Kaasan," he replied, returning her kiss before settling himself beneath the blankets on the futon. "Good night."_

"_Sweet dreams, my son," she said and softly began the lullaby once more._

* * *

:He was falling… falling…

…into nothingness…

…fear… uncontrollable fear…

…and he was crying but there was no answer to his frantic cries…

…just the falling into nothingness and the overwhelming feeling of…

…abandonment…:

_Hiei moaned, caught in the grip of his fever-induced nightmare._

"_No… please," he muttered, "not again…"_

"_Shhhh, little one," Shiori soothed gently reaching out to stroke the small face. "It's all right."_

_She continued her caresses, murmuring softly as she tried to soothe the little demon into sleep once more. Hiei heard the soft words; felt the cool hand on his face. _

"_Kaasan…" he muttered._

"_Hai," she assured him thinking he'd muttered the appellation only in his sleep. "I'm here." She reached out to touch his cheek again but stopped as she realized he was fully awake, half-lidded eyes watching her._

"_You won't leave me, will you?" he pleaded fiercely, the grip on her hand tightening._

"_No," she replied with a shake of her head. "I won't leave, I promise you. Now, close your eyes and go back to sleep."_

"_Arigatou, Kaasan," he mumbled, closing his eyes and settling his head on the pillow once more._

"_You're welcome, my beautiful demon child," she said and leaning over, placed a soft kiss on his forehead; and with that kiss, claimed him as her own._


	3. Intermezzo

_**(Standard disclaimer: I don't own YYH or its characters; they are the sole property of Yoshihiro Togashi, Shonen Jump Comics Weekly, Studio Pierrot and Fuji Television)**_

**_----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_**

Shiori came back to herself, smiling softly at the memory. Feeling a pair of blood-red eyes on her, she looked up; turning that tender smile on the small hiyoukai still perched on the window sill. He was still her Irascible Imp; as much **_her_** own as Shuiichi had been, and she loved him just as she had her only child.

Seeing her look, and the smile she gave him, Hiei started. Dropping his eyes from her face, he squeezed them tightly closed, his hands curling into taut fists.

"How?" he whispered, so softly she could barely hear him. "I don't under….."

"Hiei!" she broke in quickly rising from her place on the bed and going him. "What is it? What's wrong?" She reached out, gently placing her hand against his cheek. He stiffened at the contact but did nothing to rebuff it.

"Hiei," she tried again, "daijobu desu ka?"

He shook his head, fists tightly clenched; ruby eyes still closed, refusing to meet hers.

"Tell me," she prompted.

"How can you do that?" he asked his voice low. "You look at me with such love…" He raised his head; anguished eyes opening to fix her with a look so full of desolation it hit her like a physical blow. "Why?" he choked the word out.

"Because I _**do** _love you," she replied simply.

"NO," he gasped, voice raw with his grief. "You **_can't_**… you must NOT!"

Hiei twisted away from her touch, and she was sure, then, that he would leave; jump from the window to the tree outside and run, never to return. Yet he didn't, though some part of himself urged him to do just that. Instead, he huddled into himself, drawing his knees up to his chest, his arms resting atop them. Lowering his head, he hid his face in his arms.

Didn't she understand? He was Hiei, the imiko; outcast and hated by his own race. No **_one_** was supposed to care about him, let alone **_love_** him. And yet, this woman did. She… and another.

"Hiei?" Again Shiori reached out, placing her hand on his arm. This time, though, he did not respond to her touch. "Look at me."

"Please," he said, his voice muffled against his arms, "don't you understand?"

Slowly, he raised his head, eyes bright with unshed tears as he gazed back at her. Reaching out, he clasped the hand on his arm, squeezing tightly. Shiori winced, but did not remove her hand from his grasp.

"**_He_** loved, Kaasan… and he's dead now… because of **_me_**!"


	4. Sacrifice

_**(Standard disclaimer: I don't own YYH or its characters; they are the sole property of Yoshihiro Togashi, Shonen Jump Comics Weekly, Studio Pierrot and Fuji Television)**_

**Type in _italics_ indicates a 'flashback sequence.**

* * *

_It had been a fine summer's day, that Saturday; wisps of clouds, mere gossamer strands of white spun across a sky of crystal azure, and the sun, golden, as it spread its warmth upon the fresh green earth. Yet the four former members of the Reikai Tantei were unaware of any of this, having spent the better part of the day huddled within the darkness of the movie house._

_It was Kurama's idea. He'd heard the advertisement for the special showing of the 'Lord of the Rings' trilogy on the radio, and immediately seized upon the opportunity it presented…the opportunity for them **all** to be together once more. _

_After all, they hadn't seen each other since the Makai Tournament, almost two years ago: each of them busy with their own lives. Hiei had chosen to stay in Makai as Mukuro's heir-apparent. Yusuke was currently running his own small raman shop, saving to provide a better life for himself and Keiko. They'd announced their engagement in the Spring._

_Kuwabara would be starting college in September, planning to major in computer science, but for now, he spent the majority of his time at Genkai's temple, helping with the upkeep of the place and spending as much time as possible with Yukina, much to Hiei's chagrin. Kurama was spending his summer working for his soon-to-be step-father, just as he had the previous year. He'd return to begin his second year in college in the Fall as well._

_He'd managed to convince them all to come; even the recalcitrant little fire demon had agreed to return to the world he hated, albeit reluctantly – and **only** after Kurama had bribed him with the promise of 'sweet snow' following the mini-movie marathon. At least, let the fox **think** that had been his only reason for coming back. _

_Hiei had come to Kurama's window the night before, after a quick visit to Genkai's to see Yukina, making sure his sister remained safe and well. The idiot had been there, of course, and they'd traded insults, Hiei scowling at his nemesis the entire time before finally taking his leave, but not until Yukina had wrung from him his promise that he'd not be a stranger but would visit on a regular basis, his duties permitting, of course. It was a promise he hadn't wanted to make, but she was his imouto, and he could deny her nothing._

_Kurama was waiting when Hiei finally arrived at the half-youko's home, and they talked well into the early hours of the morning before giving into sleep. It wasn't until that moment that Hiei realized how much he'd missed his former fighting partner… no, he amended, not **just **a partner, but a **friend**… my best friend. Kurama, for his part, was elated that the hiyoukai had come. Though he'd chosen to remain in the Ningenkai (for love of Shiori), he had to admit, he'd been lonely without his little fire demon (for so he'd come to think of Hiei, after admitting, if only to himself, that he was in love with the youkai)._

_When, at last, they'd exhausted themselves and their voices were still, Hiei had wanted to spend the remaining hours of the night where he'd spent so many before, on the windowsill, but Kurama wouldn't hear of it. He insisted the small Koorime take the bed, while he pulled the futon from his closet, set it up and at last, settled down for a few hours of rest._

_The next morning, after breakfast and a brief visit with Shiori, the two set out for the movie house, where they'd agreed to meet Yusuke and Kuwabara._

_After greeting each other and getting their tickets, the four had settled into their seats and spent the day watching the trilogy. None of them spoke much, either before the movies began or once they'd ended and the four boys made their way to the ice cream parlor, opting instead just to enjoy being together again. Even then, they'd done nothing more than order their treats, eating them in comfortable silence._

_It was only on the walk home that it had begun to feel like 'old times'. Yusuke and Kuwabara, as usual, had begun arguing, this time over some baseball game they'd watched on television the previous evening. Kurama favored them with an indulgent look, eyebrows raised and a small smile gracing his full lips, as he walked beside his diminutive, crimson-eyed friend; neither he nor Hiei speaking, each content just to be in the other's presence._

_They'd just entered the park, Yusuke and Kuwabara several yards ahead and still arguing, when Kurama suddenly froze. With a movement that rivaled the speed of the fire demon at his side, he reached out, grabbing Hiei and shoving the hiyoukai to the ground behind him, effectively shielding the smaller body with his own._

"_Ku…RA…" the rest of the angry exclamation died in his throat as Hiei looked up, ruby eyes widening in shock as the half dozen demons that hadn't been there a moment ago, attacked; one pulling a sword from where he'd just embedded it deep within the kitsune's chest. The look in those eyes quickly changed to anger as he watched the red-headed fox sink to his knees. In an instant, Hiei was on his feet, katana blurring in a stroke, ending the demon's life before he'd even realized he'd been struck. Placing himself between the fox and the remaining assailants, Hiei prepared to defend his wounded friend, his mind vaguely registering the fact that Kurama had somehow sensed them when he had not._

"_Rei Gun!"_

"_Spirit Sword!"_

…_..echoed in the night sky as Yusuke and Kuwabara ran to join the fray. With an ease borne of familiarity, the three ex-Reikai Tantei made short work of the assassination squad. All, save one, now lay dead at the feet of the four young men; the last now held firmly against a tree by the small, enraged fire demon, a blood soaked katana held firmly at his throat._

"_Makoto," Hiei hissed, recognizing his would-be assassin. "What is this? Who sent you? And why?"_

_The demon stared coolly back at the small figure; his yellow eyes betraying no fear, an evil grin spreading slowly across his pale green features._

"_I have failed," was all he said._

"_Meaning?" Hiei pressed the katana into his throat, a thin line of blood welling up against the light skin._

"_Mukuro had no right to make something like **you**_ _her heir," he answered calmly. "That honor belonged to my lord, Kirin, and no other."_

"_Kirin put you up to this?"_

"_No," Makoto shook his head, the blade at his throat drawing more blood. "He had no knowledge of my plan. Your death was to be my gift to him, along with the kingdom that should have been his."_

"_Hn," was the only response before Hiei withdrew his sword from the assassin's throat, only to plunge it into his heart a moment later. Quickly he pulled it out, turning his back as the body slid softly to the ground, and strode back to where Kurama now lay, propped up against Kuwabara's strong chest, his bloody hand covering the mortal wound. Yusuke stood nearby, running a hand through his dark hair, peat dark eyes desperately trying to deny the truth that lay before him. _

"_Fox," Hiei softly called as he knelt beside the wounded boy and took Kurama's hand in his. Looking up, blood-red eyes met the small, dark eyes of Kuwabara. The carrot-topped young man shook his head once in response to the unasked question._

"_Hiei?" The hiyoukai started at the sound of the soft voice._

"_I'm here, Fox," he replied, gently squeezing the slender hand in his._

"_Hiei…Kaasan?" Emerald eyes, shining in the darkness, looked over at the small demon._

"_Don't worry…. I'll look out for her, I promise."_

"_Arigatou, Hiei," Kurama smiled at his friend, blood trickling from the corner of his mouth. Suddenly, he began to chuckle softly; the sound startling the three ex-Reikai Tantei._

"_Fox," Hiei questioned gently, "what is it? What's so funny?"_

"_Not 'funny'," the kitsune shook his head, that soft smile still gracing his beautiful face. "Ironic."_

"_What is?" _

"_That it takes my death to give me the courage, at last, to tell you something I've wanted to tell you for so long."_

"_Kurama... baka kitsune…. what the **hell** are you talking about?" Raggedly spoken, the words tumbled out, and Hiei drew a quivering breath as he looked at his friend, wanting to deny what he saw there._

_Slipping his hand from the little demon's grasp and reaching up, Kurama tenderly caressed the handsome, child-like features of his love._

"_Ai shiteru, Hiei," he whispered as the Koorime placed his tiny hand atop that of the fox, pressing the palm against his cheek. _

_Once more, Kurama smiled, viridian eyes locked on ruby, as he took a final breath, releasing it slowly as his eyes closed forever more._


	5. Intermezzo Duex

_**(Standard disclaimer: I don't own YYH or its characters; they are the sole property of Yoshihiro Togashi, Shonen Jump Comics Weekly, Studio Pierrot and Fuji Television)**_

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"My fault," the small figure murmured, turning away from the woman at his side. "All my fault."

Blood-red eyes stared out at the night sky, seeking solace from the stars that glittered like so many diamonds upon the indigo blanket of the heavens.

"If only I hadn't come back," he continued, the deep baritone soft, musing and filled with so much pain it broke Shiori's heart. "Stupid fox….." (so much affection in the endearing nickname) "…..if only I hadn't listened to you…. hadn't let you talk me into coming back… but no, it isn't your fault…. I **_wanted_** to come…. wanted…. **_needed_** to see you again…. if only I hadn't been so selfish, you'd still be alive."

Hiei turned back to the woman at his side, his eyes meeting hers once more, seeing the unshed tears that misted the dark eyes before him. "It's my fault your son is dead," he reiterated, "you should hate me for that. **_Why_** don't you hate me?"

Shiori smiled as she blinked back the tears from her eyes. Reaching out, she delicately ran her hand down the small cheek in a gentle caress. Hiei caught the hand in his, calloused fingers wrapping around it, holding it tightly within his own.

Again, Shiori smiled. "I could never hate you, Imp," she said, "but Hiei, you couldn't be more wrong about that night. It wasn't your fault he died." Gently she squeezed the hand holding hers. "**_Kurama_**," she went on, using that name deliberately, "died protecting the one life he loved more than his own. **_He_** made that choice, Hiei, and I couldn't love him more for having done so."


	6. Sorrows

_**(Standard disclaimer: I don't own YYH or its characters; they are the sole property of Yoshihiro Togashi, Shonen Jump Comics Weekly, Studio Pierrot and Fuji Television)**_

**Type in _italics_ indicates 'flashback' sequence.**

**Type in non-_italics_ indicates song lyrics.**

**A/N: This chapter is dedicated to mhmartini, who's posed query in her review was its inspiration. Martina -- though it's not very good, this one's for you.**

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* * *

**

"_As I love you, Fox," Hiei whispered, gently squeezing the hand still in his. "I only wish I'd told you….."_

_His voice trailed off. Of what good, though, were his wishes now? He gazed down at the pale face of the boy lying so still within Kuwabara's strong arms; gentle, forest-green eyes closed in eternal slumber. Reaching up, he brushed Kurama's bangs from his face, wondering at the silken feel of the crimson locks._

"_Hiei," Kuwabara began; his voice soft and filled with grief, "I… uh….."_

_Raising his head, Hiei regarded the human with wide, vermillion eyes. The naked anguish the carrot-topped teen saw reflected in the depths of those eyes, and Hiei's strangled, "Why?" were enough to rip a hole right through the young man's heart. He'd always thought the shrimp to be too cold, too unfeeling to care for anyone or anything other than himself. Now, he knew better, though the knowledge brought no comfort; only more grief._

_Mutely, Kuwabara shook his head, having no answer to the little demon's anguished question._

"_We need to go," Yusuke's quiet voice intruded as he knelt beside Kuwabara. Without giving either of his friends a chance to answer, he continued, "the noise will surely have attracted someone by now, and I sure as **hell **don't wanna' be around to have to explain," he jerked a thumb to the scattered corpses of the demons littering the park, "**them**."_

"_You won't, Detective," Hiei responded. Though his voice was soft, the words were not. Raising his ki, he gathered a ball of blue/black flame into his right hand, shooting it toward the six demon corpses, incinerating each in less time than it took to draw a breath._

"_Urameshi," Kuwabara looked at his friend, "what about..." He looked down at the body he held. "…..his mom… we need to….."_

"_You and Hiei, take Kurama to my place," Yusuke answered, pulling a set of keys from his pocket and tossing them to the fire demon. At the look on Kuwabara's face, he continued, answering the unspoken question. "She's not there; don't worry."_

_Kuwabara nodded. "So, then, where're you goin'?" he asked._

"_Baka, where do ya' think?" Yusuke snorted, then added softly, "someone has to tell his mom."_

_Again, Kuwabara nodded then gently lifted the lifeless boy in his arms as he stood. The boys separated; Kuwabara and Hiei heading for the apartment Yusuke now shared with his fiancée, and Yusuke to the Minamino house, wondering just how he was going to tell Shiori that her only child was dead._

_

* * *

_

_Hiei unlocked the door and stepped into the darkened apartment. Quickly locating the nearest source of light, he turned the lamp on, just as Kuwabara came through the door. Gently, the taller boy laid the body he carried on the sofa then went in search of a blanket._

_Alone with his fox, Hiei knelt beside the sofa. Reaching out a tentative hand, he smoothed crimson locks from the still, pale face. Kurama appeared to be sleeping, if not for the dark stain marring the sea-green silk of the shirt he wore._

"_Stupid fox," he whispered tenderly, "couldn't you, just this once, have thought of yourself instead of someone else? Tell me," his voice quivered, almost breaking, "what am I supposed to do now… without you?"_

_The hiyoukai closed his eyes, fighting the tears that threatened just as Kuwabara returned, clutching the blanket he'd found. Shaking it out, the carrot-topped teen spread it over Kurama's body, tucking it gently around the slender form and up under his chin._

"_Hiei….." he began looking down to where the little demon had been sitting only to find the space empty. Hearing a noise from behind, he quickly turned to find the living room window open, Hiei perched on the sill._

"_What the….. where the heck are you goin'?" he asked, anger stirring within._

"_Makai," was the clipped response._

"_Bu… but…. Urameshi'll be comin' with Kurama's mom. Dontcha' think ya' should at least wait….."_

_A glare from blood-red eyes silenced whatever else he was about to say. "Mukuro needs to know what happened," Hiei ground out before disappearing into the night._

"_Damned shrimp," Kuwabara muttered as he walked to the window, shut and locked it, "why do ya' **always** have ta' hide whatcha' feel? It's okay to hurt... and to grieve, ya' know."_

_Sighing, he walked back to the couch and slumped to the floor beside the body lying peacefully upon it. Drawing his knees up to his chest, Kuwabara wrapped his arms around them, and closing his eyes, laid his head down on them, giving way to his own pain and grief._

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* * *

_

_Yusuke stopped just outside the gated entryway. Leaning against the whitewashed concrete wall, he studied the house before him, noting the welcoming light that spilled from the carriage lamp mounted just to the right of the doorframe. How am I supposed to do this, he thought with a sigh, running his hand through thickly gelled raven hair. How did you tell a mother her only child was dead? With a heavy heart, and another sigh, Yusuke moved forward up the paved walk to the front door. Steeling himself for the task ahead, he raised a hand, index finger pushing gently against the doorbell, only vaguely hearing the soft chimes within._

_The door opened, revealing a smiling Shiori. "Forget your key again, musu…." the teasing voice broke off as she realized the young man standing before her was not her son. "Yusuke," she began, "what are you doing here? I thought you'd gone to the movie with….." Whatever else she was about to say died in her throat at his nod._

"_We did," he replied, his dark eyes studiously studying the ground at his feet._

_Icy fear settled around Shiori's heart. "Then I don't understand," she said. "Why are you... wait…." Her eyes searched the darkness behind the boy, vainly looking for the three who weren't there. "Where are the others, then…. Hiei, Kazuma and…. and….my son?" she finished quietly._

"_Mrs. Minamino," Yusuke looked up, finally meeting her eyes. "Could we go inside? I…. I have something I need to tell you."_

_Numbly, she nodded then stood to the side, allowing the ex-Tantei to pass. Yusuke removed his shoes, walking into the living room as Shiori closed the door softly and followed him. Turning, he faced her again._

"_I think you might want to sit down," he said._

"_Yusuke…. what's happened?" she asked, the fear she felt a palpable thing now. "Please…. just tell me," she finished, sinking down onto the sofa cushions, her eyes pleading with him to tell her that everything was all right, yet knowing that it was not and never would be again._

_Yusuke looked down at the woman in front of him, seeing the silent plea in her dark eyes. Dammit! Why did this have to happen? Slowly he approached her. Kneeling down in front of her, and with a tenderness few ever saw from the former street punk, Yusuke took Shiori's hands in his own._

"_Kazuma and Hiei took Kurama to my place," he began, using the demon's name, since he knew Shiori was well aware of who and what her son truly was. He paused, gently squeezing the hands he held. "There was some trouble on the way home tonight." _

_Before she could ask, he hurried on, "we were walking home…. just gotten to the park, when we were attacked."_

"_Attacked?" Shiori breathed, closing her eyes for just a moment, the band of ice around her heart contracting painfully. "Who…. or what?..."_

_Yusuke nodded, again applying soft pressure to the hands he held. "They were demons," he went on. "We learned later that they were an assassination squad – after Hiei."_

_Shiori's eyes widened, her grip on Yusuke's hands tightening. "Oh God! Is he..."_

"_He's fine, but….." Suddenly Yusuke tore his gaze from hers, unable to look into those soft, unfathomable eyes – so like Kurama's had been._

"_Yusuke." A soft hand on his cheek turned his face back to hers. "Please... I have to know."_

_He nodded, taking her hand into his once more. "I don't know how," he said quietly, peat dark eyes misting with the tears he refused to let fall, "but somehow Kurama…. he sensed them before the rest of us. He…. he pushed Hiei behind him just as one of them attacked. He took the….." He swallowed as the tears spilled over, silently falling. "Mrs. Minamino, I…I'm so sorry but….Kurama….he….he….he's dead."_

"_Nooooo!" The broken whisper echoed in the stillness of the small room. Shiori shook her head, not wanting to believe, yet knowing the words she'd heard were true. Her son…. her Shuiichi…. was dead! No, her mind argued, that can't be! Dear God! He was barely 19! He had his whole life ahead of…. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!_

_Soft, broken words penetrated her haze of pain and the thoughts whirling through her brain._

"_Mrs. Minamino," Yusuke began. "I wish that it had been me…. or **any** one of us except….."_

_Shiori put her arms around the boy, pulling him to her in a warm embrace. "No Yusuke." She shook her head. "Don't say that. Don't ever even think it again."_

"_B..but…" he sobbed, his face hidden._

"_I know," she replied, still holding him, letting him cry himself out. She felt the wetness of her own tears as they fell, mingling with those of the boy in her arms. Finally, the storm abated and Yusuke pulled back, looking up at her._

"_I want to see my son," she said, reaching out to wipe the remaining tears from his face._

_Yusuke nodded and helped her to her feet._

_

* * *

_

_Kuwabara felt their presence several seconds before the door opened and looked up as Shiori stepped into the dimly lit apartment; Yusuke behind her._

"_Ma'am," he greeted her quietly, climbing to his feet._

"_Hello, Kazuma," she returned. She smiled gently at the orange-haired teen before her eyes fell to the slender body lying on the sofa, covered in a soft blanket. Again, she felt tears fill her eyes and slip down her cheeks as she approached._

_Tenderly she lifted the scarlet head as she slipped onto the couch. Wrapping her arms around Kurama's lifeless form, she held her son in a gentle embrace._

"_Where's Hiei?" Yusuke whispered as Kuwabara came to stand beside him._

"_Gone," was the equally quiet response from the taller boy. Hearing a sound, both boys turned their attention to the sofa._

_Kurama's head lay in Shiori's lap now as she softly smoothed flame-red locks back from his face. Her lips moved, singing the song that had been his favorite lullaby as a child._

Where is love  
Does it fall from skies above  
Is it underneath the willow tree  
That I've been dreaming of

_She continued on, stroking her son's cheek as she sang his final lullaby. When she was finished, she wrapped her arms around him, once more embracing him to her. Leaning down, she placed a soft kiss on his forehead._

"_Sleep well, musuko-chan," she whispered, "ai shiteru."_

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_On the roof of the building directly across the street from the apartment, a small dark figure, his ki masked so completely as to be utterly untraceable and invisible to those within that apartment, stood, hands thrust deep into the hidden pockets of his black cloak._

"_Forgive me," Hiei whispered….._


	7. Coda

_**(Standard disclaimer: I don't own YYH or its characters; they are the sole property of Yoshihiro Togashi, Shonen Jump Comics Weekly, Studio Pierrot and Fuji Television)**_

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"Forgive me." A solitary tear slipped from ruby eyes as Hiei looked at the woman before him – the only mother he'd ever known. The crystal drop trailed slowly down his cheek, coalescing into a stone so red it appeared almost black as it fell from his chin, dropping with a soft '**_ping_**' onto the windowsill. Hiei picked it, clenching it in his bandaged fist. "Kaasan…. I….."

Shiori smiled gently at this small being…. her son – for so she had come to think of him; had done, in fact, since that first night.

"There is nothing to forgive, Hiei," she told him. "He loved you and would not want you to keep blaming yourself." Soft brown eyes met crimson. "**_I_** love you, as well, and nothing will ever change that."

He wanted to deny her words, but he couldn't, for he knew, deep within his heart of hearts, that she was right. He looked down, opening his hand to stare at the tiny gem in his palm. He continuing looking at the stone until a feather-soft touch on his cheek caused him to look up. Shiori traced the blood-red trail the tear had left.

"Hiei," she began, the sheen of unshed tears in her eyes, "promise me that you won't ever leave and stay away for so long again." She swallowed, her tears now spilling over to slip down her cheeks as she held his eyes with her own.

"I have already lost one son," she continued when she trusted herself to speak again. "I can't bear the thought of losing the other," she finished.

Hiei looked at her, his throat tight. He broke the gaze, looking down at the stone he still held. Reaching over, he gently took her hand, dropping the tear gem into her palm and folding her fingers around it.

Bringing the hand to his lips, he brushed a soft kiss against her fingers, sealing his promise with the words, "you have my word, Kaasan."

* * *

They had talked far into the night, and now, as the first rays of the morning sun lit the dusky rose sky of dawn, one slept while the other kept watch.

The scene was familiar and Shiori smiled fondly as she watched the small figure sleeping soundly in her son's bed; her hand clasped tightly in his, just as it had been that night, so long ago.

A soft breeze, perfumed with the scent of roses, wafted through the open window. Shiori raised her face, feeling the gentle caress against her cheek.

"Thank you for bringing him home again," she whispered to it, tears springing to her eyes.

"You're welcome," she heard it whisper in return. Shiori could almost see her son's gentle smile as she listened to the wind. "Ai shiteru, Kaasan," it whispered again before disappearing.

"And I you, my son," she said, smiling through her tears.

**Owari**

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**A/N: Well there it is – my first pathetic attempt at an anime fanfic is now finished. Many many thanks to all who have reviewed by little story – your words meant the world to me.**


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